Well, I did it, Internet… I completed my first full day of work since 2005. I forgot to put on deoderant this morning and had to escape to the bathroom to stuff toilet paper under my arms to make sure I didn’t sweat through my shirt. I envisioned forgetting about the TP and it falling out of my sleeve while I went to shake hands with the president of the company. Luckily that didn’t happen and I think I’ve dodged the bullet of being “Pit Stains Ahn” for the duration of my time with the company. Whew. Close call there.
It was quiet – eerily quiet. Nobody ran in circles yelling “DOUBLE-YEW DOUBLE-YEW DOUBLE-YEW” (Julian’s big into the alphabet at the moment) but as my new boss took me around and introduced me to people a few co-workers did make jokes about so-and-so who likes to throw food and this person that screams and has tantrums and I thought, “Huh, maybe this won’t be so different from life at home” but then when 10:30 rolled around and we didn’t gather together for goldfish crackers and apple juice I realized that this was a whole new ballgame.
There isn’t really much for me to do yet so I did a lot of pretending to look busy. I went for lunch with my new boss. I signed up for the “friday wine & cheese club” (after watching a re-run of The Office last week John had challenged me to try & start a “finer things” club at my new office. Little did he know it would already exist. Dammit, I should have bet money on it) and I signed a waiver saying that I wouldn’t sue them if I hurt myself using their gym (I’ll let you insert your own joke here at my expense. There are so many I jus tcan’t choose one). The yin to the “gym room”s yang is the “hangover room” which has a bed in it. Now they’re talking my language.
Anyway, I survived and Julian survived and there appears to be some alcohol and some naps in my future with the company so all in all I’d say it was a success.
I’ll let you know how the rest of the week pans out. I hope for it to include the use of a few more hygiene products.
